Along the walk that is my life, I find, like so many do, that walking with partners and friends makes the journey. . . well, more . . . livable. And as is the nature of people, from time to time, it is those partners that lead me astray. In reality, it is more often that I am the one leading myself right over a cliff all of my own accord, but from time to time it is another who holds my hand.
It is at those times of companionship that I've felt the more betrayed, even though the more serious and intentional missteps were surely of my own doing. Why the intensity I feel? Perhaps because of the deception involved. Now self-deception I'm no stranger to and forgiveness for it gets easier every day. After all forgiving myself seems to be an activity I practice daily. ;-)
But still it is when I've been led that troubles me most. When someone has held my hand and whispered words to soothe my soul and keep me walking, traipsing along the path they've laid out with their lie. As down the road we go, I lose my way. I lean more and more on the deception and wonder more and more where my way went.
Only the soft stillness of self-reflection orients me again. Finding time to delve the Word and find the Way again in what is Written. Because of one thing I am certain. Whenever I am lost, He is looking for me. Crook in hand, calling my name, tirelessly searching and longing for my return. If I simply stop and listen, allow the Father to find me, my path will be straightened. As it is written:
I waited patiently for the Lord to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire.
He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along.
He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see what he has done and be amazed. They will put their trust in the Lord.
-- Psalm 40: 1-3
This is the only way I know to handle the destruction from a deception. Or most anything really.
Just goes to show you that I'm a pretty simple guy really.